This year, both of our scholarship opportunities occur during Lent and relate to our inner-city mission trip to the Bay Area in California. The first one asks students to do an intense study of the Gospel of Luke, reading it through the lens of what Jesus says and about and how he interacts with the poor, outcast, and those with less power. The second asks students to fast from something for Lent. Here is Chad's (our Junior High pastor) description of the scholarship, which he put together:
I do not want you to fast from food. Instead, I want you to look at your possessions and think of the homeless. What do you have that is important to you that they don’t? I’m thinking you fast from TV, internet use, video games, MP3 use etc. The goal is to deny ourselves from something that we “depend on” or is important to us in order to devote more of our lives depending on God, who is the most important aspect of life.I've been wondering what exactly I would fast from. I don't really listen to much music, I don't watch television, and I don't play video games. Since it's important to me to experience this fast with the students going on our trip, I wanted to choose something that would be meaningful, but I couldn't (or wasn't willing to) really think of anything.
Then I realized what I do tons of: blogging.
I hated the idea of giving up blogging at first. Which is why I now know I need to fast from blogging for Lent. I haven't even started yet, but God has revealed to me through my fighting and prayer why this will be good for me:
I want to choose what I want to do with my time. I serve in a church, have a good relationship with my family, and give lots of time to both. Why shouldn't I get to choose what I do with my free time, especially if the pursuit is to understand how to serve God better? No matter how noble a pursuit, if I put it above submitting myself to God, it becomes an ignoble pursuit.
I want to be liked and impressive. This one's painful for me to admit. I'm not an especially charismatic or fun guy. I did, after all, go to math camp. When I was growing up, I cherished the attention that I got for doing well in school, playing the piano, and getting in the tiny local newspaper as a soccer player. Not a ton of people read this blog on a regular basis, but when they do, it makes me feel good. And that's something God needs to burn to a crisp in me.
My spiritual life exists in my head. I'm a math guy. I want things to make sense, and writing helps me make sense of things. It's how I work through issues, think through ministry stuff, and figure out how to be a better leader. But my heart needs work. So, I intend to take the time I would be blogging and give my soul some care.
If you're so inclined, I would appreciate your prayers. I'm looking forward to experiencing Lent with our students (beginning with Ash Wednesday tomorrow), discuss what we're learning about God, and spending much of my free time learning how to submit to God and be in his presence. Have a great Lent, and I'll see you after Easter Sunday. To God be the glory.
