I can see it in how I conducted myself for the first part of my youth ministry career, and I'm sure remnants of that sin still linger in how I lead from time to time. I think the "We Know Best" syndrome, as I call it, is becoming less common in youth ministry, but there are still times when it seems that the collective attitude of youth workers is that we're on the cutting edge of what God wants to accomplish among teenagers, and others are simply slow to catch the vision and get behind us. Some symptoms of the "We Know Best" syndrome:
Us vs. parents attitude. Yes, we all probably have stories about a conflict with or unfair criticism from a parent. But chances are we've had plenty of bad days when it comes to working with teenagers, and we still pour our lives into them, don't we? Why would it be different with parents? It's not us against the parents. Repeat: It's not us against the parents. When we believe it is, we believe that we know best.
Us vs. the senior pastor, the board, or other leadership attitude. I distinctly remember having a meeting with an interim pastor at my first church. The night before, I had presented an idea to our board: why not raise a million dollars to serve the least of these in our community? After all, I reasoned, we had just raised that much money to put an addition on our church. The interim pastor gently let me know that I had actually offended several board members. My heart was in the right place, but my attitude was overly prideful and critical of the expense and ballooning costs of the construction project. When we serve as a youth pastor, our job is to serve under the authority of the senior pastor and other senior leadership, depending on the church's structure. Yes, sometimes conflict with senior leadership and a youth pastor happens. But I'd be willing to bet that in a large number of these conflicts, part of the issue is the youth pastor's heart.
Us vs. the old people attitude. This one's just ridiculous, because it often revolves around some issue regarding how we do things in church, such as worship style. Do some people unnecessarily hold onto human traditions that actually get in the way of proclaiming and worshiping Jesus? Yes, but this includes all of us, not just those who raise their voices when someone suggests selling the organ* in the church sanctuary. Young youth workers are just as good at needlessly holding on to human traditions. In fact, I think we're probably better at it than anyone else in the Church.
Where do you see the "We Know Best" syndrome in youth ministry? And no fair only pointing out others' faults; make sure you start with yourself.
*For the record, I love the organ. My father-in-law is an amazing church organist, and I hope to learn how to play one day.
